Apr 10, 2008

9 years ago


When I was 15 and living in the Courts I started dating boy “C” after a month of him asking me out and a month of me saying No… for some reason I knew I shouldn’t date him, but eventually gave in and dated him ( off and on and off and on and off) for about four years of my life. The place we lived in was named by the neighborhood "the Courts" it was interesting…it was a mixture of races; ethnicities and one dimensional when it came to class….we were all poor! To make things a little more interesting with my relationship with him is the fact that on one side of me he lived and on the other his ex, today I sent her this email;

Hey

So I have wanted to write you for a while (like 3 or 4 years a while) but have always got lost in the moments of my own life. I am not sure exactly why I wanted to besides the fact that I feel I may have disrespected the relationship you and C had before me and him. I was young and completely naïve of the relationship you two had prior. So I wanted to say sorry for then and sorry that it had to be so awkward living there in the courts. When he and I started dating he told me that you two had been broken up for about 8 months, I didn’t learn until later on that that was a lie… Dang Boys! I wouldn’t have gone out with him if I had known that me and him started so quick after you two. I know this happened along time ago and you probably have not thought about it since then, but I want to make it right with you if it is possible.

With that said

I wish you blessings for this new and exciting wedding and marriage that is coming up soon :)

LeahA




This is not meant to be a ‘Good is me’ post but a reminder that it’s never to late to say sorry to someone. I didn’t do it to feel justified inside, or to feel that I am a good person… I knew that I had to say sorry because of the way I acted back then even if the event so long ago and our lives have moved on. Maybe she wont receive it, maybe she will laugh but thats not suppose to be my worry or burden...mine is to act lovingly

Our words have significant power….to sooth, to bring joy and truth, to love, to hurt, to destroy, to lie…let us use our words to breathe life into people today

3 comments:

GF Girl said...

Well I for one think you did the right thing - good for you I know it's difficult, but in the end it's about what you did, not about what they did - that's what I keep reminding myself, it's how I interact with the world, not how it interacts with me - like just because I have a crazy patients, a horrible day and a long week doesn't mean I can opt not give a penny to the kid in front of my at Safeway because he was short.

Valeria. said...

i like that. its never to late to make things right. well we cant make it right, it takes two for that, but we can do our part and hope for the best. good job, that must have took courage for you as well.

hopefuly i see you soon!
love,
val

LeahA said...

So the response from her;


Hey there....

I am so grateful for your words. I too have wanted to write to you for some time now as well.....I guess this shows that you are the bigger person! I have always wanted to apologize to you for the way I treated you at that time. It wasn't right, it was immature and stupid. I was young and I am embarrased by my actions. You did nothing wrong, it's not as if we were best friends or anything! I know that you cannot help who you like and I don't blame you at all for wanting to date him. The fact that we were neighbors should not have stopped you. lol, that was so retarded of me! I don't know if you feel the same way but I feel that being with him changed me into a person I didn't like. I felt very jealous and possesive during our entire relationship and even afterwards. I am a person who is very receptive to others moods and personalities and I guess I was just reflecting the way he treated me. It was so awful though! He was very controlling of me, and in return I treated him the same way. I can see now that what we had was nothing but a mochary of love. Love is none of those things. I am so glad to say that I have now found true love and am no longer that person I was back then.... So please know that you did nothing at all and I have not thought about him for a long LONG time (besides when I found out that he's having a baby!)
Life was never akward at all living near you except the fact that I felt bad for the way I treated you. I'm so sorry

Anyways, thank you for the blessings of my marriage and stay posted for the pics!!!!